It is factual that the general public absolutely bores me. As Angus Oblong once wrote, "Thank God he grew up to be normal!".
But, well, contrary to lucky-boy Milo Oblong, I did not get the chance (yet) to participate in electroshock therapy to become
a normal person. So, most of the time, it's practice. You get used to the painfully long conversations about decomposing
relationships, sex, pointless parties, gossip about rich celebrities, the new Marvel movie that has the exact same plot
each year, the new tiktok trend that will be forgotten in two days. It is the same, over and over. You smile widely at your
colleagues, agree with every word they vomit, you go home and life goes on. You wonder why they care so much about being well-liked.
"Dude, you need to go to that party!"
"Arthur is sooo hot, I'm gonna ask him out"
"I would never do that, Diana would judge me so hard"
"Do you think my hair looks cute? I spent so much time on it."
"My football team is fucking better."
People say such things with such naturality, I can't help but to be puzzled by it. They have conversations about it with all
passion, with interest. Superficiallity is a comfortable, prideful little thing. People often told me, "everyone feels weird,
because everyone is insecure". But I have come to the realization that it isn't true. Some people truly feel like they belong.
Some people truly do everything in their power to conform and always stay perfect, always be a people-pleaser. It's fucked up.
And, once the realisation comes, and you understand that indeed nobody understands you, it's like a little suicide inside your
mind. And, well, what happens after you die with a rope on your neck and an erection in your pants? In my experience, I kinda
just didn't care anymore. Sure, I still get bored about not finding many people who sees how crazy the world is, but it feels
different. I began to appreciate my little space. Sometimes you have to suck it up, see that you are different and kind of a
weirdo, and move on.
Life is unjust and people suck. Boo-hoo! Welcome to reality. But don't worry, after sometime, it begins to feel more of a comedy
rather than a tragedy. I began to see that it isn't so bad, and there is much more to life than to be dreadful. The daily life
can be deathful, tragedious, anecdotal almost. But what you need to do is to scape. For some, it's fighting dogs (if you are reading
this Ferno, you know this one is for you). For me, it's indie/rock music and walking alone in the woods. For my trans friend, well,
he likes to cry in the shower and cosplay badass characters he wants to date even though they're 2d. I began to have passion for
things, and the world seemed a little less like a dumpster fire.
It's still hard being different, autistic in the eyes of most people, but it's cool to be myself. Actually, it made me appreciate
people more. Because when I find someone who doesn't give a fuck about the world, I know we will have an awesome punk-rock time.